I Am A Pussy
11 March 2006Today, I cried in the supermarket. On a Friday evening as everyone is getting their groceries before the weekend. I am such a pussy.
We were at New World in the City Centre getting Peter’s fix of Celestial Seasonings Green Tea with Lemon, Honey & Ginseng (I actually had to call the distributor for him, he loves it that much). I was wandering down the baking ingredients aisle when some lady smashed her cart into the back of my foot. Right at the base of my Achilles tendon. I did a, “Ffffffffuuuu-aaaaah!” and hobbled over to the shelves to get my balance to see if my foot was bleeding. It was one of those pains like when you stub your big toe really hard, and you have to sit on the ground and hold your toe, just because your brain says you need to hold it even though holding it does not help.
Anyway, evil trolley lady says, “Oh, sorry. Is there anything I can do?” In hindsight, I should have asked her to get me some frozen peas, but instead I just said no in a “go away before I cry” type of way. Peter comes over to me and asks if I’m alright and I say yes but my heel hurts like a motherfucker. At this time, I am able to succeed in pulling my sock down to see that the skin is hanging off but it’s not bleeding. For some reason, at that moment my eyes felt a bit wet. I say to Peter, “I better not cry.” Apparently, saying that actually made me cry.
So there I am, crying in front of the olive oils thinking about how I am crying in the supermarket in front of all these people over a scraped heel that isn’t even bleeding. This makes me cry even more. I was also wearing non-waterproof mascara.
| « Previous | Next » |
Comments
Hilarious.
Do you actually speak like that, “hurts like a motherfucker” ?
fuck you are funny