Wellington's Shitty Rental Market
It’s been quite a few years since I’ve had to look for a flat in Wellington, but I don’t remember it ever being as bad as it seems to be right now. Luckily, we only had to look for about two weeks for a place, which meant we only had to look at approximately 20 disgusting flats. I wish I was exaggerating.
The first thing that pissed me off was when we were looking in the Dominion Post were the prices. Apparently it is the time of the year when shitty landlords jack up the prices because they have the pick of the bunch and desperate people (such as ourselves) who are somewhat willing to pay out the nose for what is potentially a fucking dump. When I left New Zealand, I was living in a $400 per week brand new 2-bedroom apartment in the city centre with a garage (although, it was actually a shitty build with paper-thin walls and crusties living next door who used to play stupidly loud music in the middle of the night and punch our front door when we complained). I thought that place was pretty flash, seeing how I was previously living in a somewhat rundown 2-bedroom upstairs flat with a garage just on the city centre outskirts for $240 a week. Now it seems that $350 is a very average price for a 2-bedroom flat in the suburbs.
I also kept coming across things like this while reading the classifieds:
MT COOK cute 2br renovated villa with all whiteware inc dishwasher, polished floors, garage, garden, available immediately, $330pw SORRY PROPERTY LET
I mean, WHAT THE FUCK. Why even run that ad? Why waste my precious five seconds reading that? Argh!
A new thing that I noticed while doing the flat hunt was that these flats were being shown like open homes. I’m talking 15 people waiting on the street for 1:30pm while the owner put a sign up on the gate while we all rush the apartment and someone quickly says, “I’ll take it!!!!!!” and then does a victory lap around the living room while the owner gets the lease out, and while everyone else is still standing there looking in cupboards and checking the bathroom. Or, the 15 people are quickly looking at the flat and one person says, “I’ll take it!!!!!!” to which the owner or agent says, “Oh, yes, fill out this application form. We still have another 150 people to show the flat to, so we’ll get back to you.” Again, WHAT THE FUCK. If someone wants it, why not give the flat to them subject to a credit check?
Also, due to the open home-esque views, we saw the same couple at three places who I jokingly referred to as “our competition”. They were (are?) in the same position as us – have been overseas for five years, and are now staying with their parents as adults. Fun.
In addition to the crazy prices, I also noticed that the majority of the places we viewed were fucking repulsive. Stains on the carpet, mould in the bathroom, filthy walls, and trash littering the yard. Again, WHAT THE FUCK. Why bother showing a place that looks disgusting with a high rental price? Surely, only a complete dolt would bother renting it.
Some examples of great houses we’ve looked at:
- A house in Mt Victoria that had all of the windows on one side covered by a house built 25cm away, a rotting window frame that was almost falling out, and trash out the front ($350pw)
- A townhouse in Newtown that was right behind the McDonald’s on Riddiford Street so when the wind blew you could smell the rotting trash, it was also absolutely filthy with unfinished chipboard and water stains ($420pw)
- An upstairs flat in Newtown that had a shopping cart in the yard (need I say more) ($345pw)
- An expensive and supposedly very posh furnished apartment on The Terrace that had busted up whiteware from the 1970s and mould in the bathroom ($450pw)
- A really nice downstairs flat in Kelburn that was nicely laid out inside and had been freshly painted, but absolutely stunk of mould, the washing line was also in a dark alley underneath the upstairs neighbours deck ($350pw)
- An awful apartment in Stadium Gardens in Thorndon that looked like it was built by dodgy builders with no certificates who were used to building disgusting and cheap looking hotels, which was shown to us by an oldish guy from the property management company who was drunk, greasy, annoying, and extremely fat in a crinkled and ill-fitting suit ($420pw)
Another thing I noticed is that our prospective landlords were asking really personal and/or fucking stupid questions. My sister is also looking for a new place for herself, her fiancé, and her kid. We both got classics such as:
“Do you have much in savings?”
“Are you married?”
“Will your child scribble on the wallpaper?”
My sister has also noticed that people do not want to rent to anyone with children and these people are not doing a good job of pretending to not to be biased and potentially breaking the law. My sister has found that landlords will tell her something different on the telephone when she mentions she has a daughter, than to my mother who calls and mentions her granddaughter coming to visit – for example, telling my sister the place has no yard and is unfenced, to telling my mother the complete opposite. Also, telling my sister than the house is unsuitable for children but not asking my sister’s question of, “How exactly is it unsuitable?”
Basically, renting in Wellington is shit. The quality of the housing is awful, especially compared to the places I’ve lived in overseas, and the rental prices are extremely over-inflated. The agents are useless bigoted twats who seemingly don’t actually want to rent their properties. I have also learnt that “tidy” in a property ad means “disgusting”, and “cute” means “old”.
I am so glad we found a place in a decent area that wasn’t completely over our budget, owned by a woman who actually seems to be a decent human being. My sister however, is still looking…
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Comments
Gwwaa, love this piece, classic Ani Rant. Read it out loud people, it will have you rotflol.
Ani, I think I should hand whatsuckswhere.com over to you ;)
Because my visas had expired, my Belgian boyfriend wanted to move to New Zealand, and I missed my sister and my niece.
hey lady. that is a sad tale. when i was considering moving to wellington a few months ago & looking at flathunt.co.nz every day, i was appalled by the prices (& the pictures). i’m glad you found somewhere! it doesn’t sound like you’re enjoying nz much so far but hopefully that is because you are having lots of fun & only think to record the shitty stuff!
I’m enjoying some things – the coffee, the weather (sans the wind), the vibe – but the rest is really weird. It’s definitely not the Wellington I left and also, I have no mates! Only one friend still lives in Wellington! What a loser. :(
awww. you should spend some time on livejournal, there are MILLIONS of wellingtonians on there, some of them don’t even suck! anyway, you know how it is down there, once you’ve met a couple of people, your social life will explode. i am coming down next week for a few days (for work), let me know if you want to have coffee or cocktails or something like that.
Why the fuck are you back if its so shit?
Fuck off back to Manchester.
What a laugh!!!!
And you don’t think the quality of houses in Manchester is worse? Hmm have you actually been there, or are you writing this from the Women’s prison in Porirua?
9 March 2006